The Contrarian: Hot Dogs

Neil Parker

2015-07-05

Phil.Kessel.7.5

From Hot Dogs to Prime Rib: A Phil Kessel love Story …

"Hamburgers. The cornerstone of any nutritious breakfast." – Jules Winnfield (Samuel L. Jackson) from the movie Pulp Fiction.

If true, then it must follow that hotdogs would be a great meal option for lunch.

I bring this up because earlier this week Steve Simmons of the Toronto Sun wrote a piece about Phil Kessel and his lead in was about how a hot dog vendor located near Kessel's condo has now lost his biggest customer.

Somehow, the fact that Kessel regularly consumes a hot dog (actually do we know that it's not a sausage?) for lunch is the underlying premise in his story. Because he ate hot dogs, he became a poison.

— Editor Note: The Simmons’ hot dog story may be entirely fabricated, too.

According to Simmons, "He didn't eat right, train right, play right" and that meant that "The Leafs were sick and tired of Kessel."

He concludes, "What matters is that Kessel is gone. That who he is, what he represents, what he isn't, had to be removed from the ice, from the dressing room, from the road, from the restaurants — from everywhere. They couldn't have him around anymore and be honest about the direction they intend to pursue. Everything they believe in for the future is almost everything Kessel has proven to be lacking in."

Later on that day he visited TSN 1050's Drive with Dave Naylor and attempted to link everyone involved around Kessel as having been fired (beings at the 7:20 mark and goes to 8:25). Starting with Peter Chiarelli, to Brian Burke, to Ron Wilson, to Randy Carlyle and his assistant coaches, to Dave Nonis and finally to the Peter Horachek and his staff all being fired. Stating that Kessel was the common thread, the poison that got them all.

(All as per www.hockeydb.com)

Mmmmmm. Very tasty.

Is it a surprise that Kessel would be critical with management, with the coaching staff? As much as we all look from the point of view of management trying to motivate and get the best out of Phil, he wanted the same from them.

Since the Sundin fiasco there has not been a centerman that was near the top calibre that was promised by management to Leaf fans. Kadri may still develop into one but he is not there yet.

Speaking of which, that leads me to this article by Yahoo's Puck Daddy. In it he writes, "In fact, Bozak has been a drag on Kessel for years. And hey what do you know, Kessel drives possession better and outscores the competition more often when Carlyle has deigned to put him together with Kadri. But without Kessel, Bozak becomes an absolute dud (27.5 CF%, 37.5 GF%), below replacement level."

I guess Phil made his coaches pair him up with Bozak because he knew it would help him get more points.

But Puck Daddy was wrong with his number one reason why the Leafs would do better after Carlyle was fired. He assumed that management wanted them to.

When Horachek was assigned the interim head coach position it was for no other reason but to get this team to lose. Take guys like Kessel, a sports car, and make him plow fields and tow dead weight around.

Despite what Horachek or upper management were saying about playing the right way and the team-first way, the underlying goal was to lose. Maybe it would be enough to win the lottery pick. It didn't work out but was always going to be a gamble.

Brendan Shanahan is correct when he says that the team needs to change, but it is not because Kessel is a locker-room poison. It is because they can't assemble a cast of teammates (by trade or free agency) that can play with him.

Six seasons have gone by and it could not get done. It should make you think why it has been so difficult to find quality centermen to play in Toronto. Maybe Sundin can answer that question.

They have to build through the draft and by the time those draft choices mature Kessel would have become a beaten-up, broken-down sports car in the middle of a barren field.

Unlike other past American goal scorers like Jeremy Roenick, Keith Tkachuk and Brett Hull, Kessel doesn't gravitate to being in the spotlight. That makes him a media whipping boy and Simmons wants to give him one more lashing before he goes out the door.

I am a Phil Kessel owner in my keeper pool. I have had him since he was drafted into the NHL and consider myself fortunate he has been on my fantasy team. In the past, I have inquired into possibly trading him away, but the media's perception of him has always made it difficult to get a fair return. So, he remained on my roster, and I am glad because he has been a valuable part of a team that has earned me some prizes.

Simmons wants you to focus on his eating habits. Not his stats.

Disregard that during those six years, Kessel was behind only Alexander Ovechkin, Steven Stamkos, Corey Perry and Rick Nash in scoring. Wouldn't you love to have that kind of production in a keeper roto pool?

Ignore that he contributed to slightly under 15 percent of all the Leaf's team scoring in that same span.

He did all this with hot dogs. Now we will all get to see what he will do with prime cuts in Pittsburgh.

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