Ramblings: Answering very specific questions

Michael Clifford


With regards to hockey, there are many more questions than answers right now. Sports, as a general concept, need to take a backseat to everything else at the moment. What it does let us think about is questions relating to the game we love. Let's try to answer some of those burning questions.


Which NHL player would make the best rescue option if you were kidnapped by a demon from the netherworld?

As I sit here watching the original 'Ghostbusters', it seems to me we are woefully underprepared should the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man ever return to wreak havoc on New York City. Suppose we are Sigourney Weaver's character, Dana Barrett, and we needed one NHL player to come free us. Who would we want to rely on?

One guy I wouldn't rely on is Brandon Pirri. That guy has 23 more career goals than assists. He's not coming to help.

We need someone who would have courage in the face of danger, yet not be so headstrong as to not think through the situation. We need someone who is smart, but not so bookish that they can't think outside the box. We also need someone who is not afraid to get their hands dirty or face slimed, all while not eschewing their humanity.

Which player has courage, what could loosely be termed as 'street smarts', and isn't afraid to mix it up when necessary? Give me Zdeno Chara.

Yeah, I know, picking the guy that is 6'10", 250 lbs and a powerlifter seems obvious. But as we've seen through his many, many visits to the children's hospital as well as worldwide aid, he has a caring side to him all while not being afraid to throw around some NHL delinquents. He speaks several languages fluently, so he's obviously a smart guy, but his travels around the globe has provided him wisdom from many, many cultures.

Not only is he a big strong guy, but smart, courageous, and likely very resourceful as well. If you ever hear a friend say, "Only Zuul," call Big Z.


Which hockey player would be the best pro wrestler?

The world of professional wrestling, historically speaking, is a world of showmanship. It's about being so over-the-top that people cannot look away, yet at times being subtle enough to support drama-filled storylines with body language and in-ring moves. It's about being able to connect with the audience in a very real way while also suspending